By Megan Murray
Upon my 36th year, I wished to impart the wisdom I have learned upon the younger generation. I sat down to write a missive on the truths of life, self, and the world around us. Unfortunately, I have an absolute inability to be serious for more than 25.4 seconds.
1.) The likelihood of a product being discontinued is in inverse proportion to how awesome it is: If a product is universally flattering, has great quality, or makes you look 10 years younger, hoard it like the end of civilization is imminent. Max Factor Pan Stik is gone forever, but I am pretty sure the post-nuclear mutant cockroaches will be reading in their post-nuclear mutant cockroach fashion magazines about how AWESOME Great Lash is!
2.) Be wary of the internet lemming : I am not too proud to admit I’ve rubbed everything from Cool Whip (not good) to Aspirin (very good) on my face. There have been times the ladies at CVS threatened to report me for stalking while waiting for a shipment of Drac’s Drool from Wet-n-Wild. Oh yes, I have trotted right off the beauty cliff quite a few times on the recommendation of a well meaning internet rave. Just turn a critical eye to a spectacular anti-aging skin care recommendation written by a 20 year old woman who has used the product for 2 days.
3.) Shout-down the snobs: One of the most enlightening websites (besides Painted Ladies…seriously, what would you do without my dazzling intellect) is the Beauty Brains.
If you ever felt bad that you couldn’t afford a 200 dollar eye cream, mosey on over to this site who is written by actual cosmetics chemists. If you can and want to spend 200 dollars on an eye cream , by all means…go for it. If you think that product is going to prevent aging better than a drugstore sunscreen-you are whack.
4.) Stop fighting it: I am not going to be tan, I am not going to have curly hair, I am no longer 22, and I am not built like a model. The worst blunders I have ever made were trying to change who I am and not trying to enhance what I have. When I style my hair with its straightness in mind, it looks great. When I wear age-appropriate clothing I look fresh and put together. When I work against my personality I look drab. I am never going to be the JCrew girl. When I wear a tiger print wrap dress…ahhh…I am completely Megan!
Quick Side Note: Wet n Wild Walking on Eggshells is one of the most versatile eyeshadows trios. The colors are rich in pigment and have great lasting power.
I cannot think of a skin tone that would not be flattered. So, grab about 10 of them, because I guarantee it will be discontinued by next week.