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Dis-Stain

By Megan Murray

Maybelline 10 HR Stain Gloss promises the following:

  • Vibrant and shiny wear; never flat
  • Feels fresh all day, never dry.
  • Glides on wet and smooth, never drags
  • Shine enhancing formula provides a lightweight layer of lasting color

So I thought. “what the heck?” It is a dreary week here, and I really want to try a violet lip.

I snatched up the gloss in Luxurious Lilac (gorgeous color…I will get to that later) and waited in the self checkout line behind someone with TWO carts full of stuff and about 4.7 million coupons.

Let me take a moment here to express two things 1.) Self checkout is when you have, let’s say, a box of tampons, some cat food, Midol, lip gloss, and granola bars and you want to get out of Dodge ASAP.  If you take a full order of food to self check-out the store should allow the people behind you to throw stuff at you as you check out. 2.) I am not impressed with extreme couponing if all you are buying is a lifetime supply of Vo5 conditioner and Airwick room fresheners. Why do you need 10 Airwick room fresheners?

Anyway, I excitedly put my new lip gloss on in my car (ya know, like I am some make-up deprived person who didn’t fall into the Clinique GWP trap last week) and I looked at the clock and it was 5:30 EST.  I thought- woohoo I will have lipstick on through Mad Men AND Game of Thrones!  I’m lying, I didn’t think that, I was still thinking about the Airwick room fresheners.

Luxurious Lilac is a gorgeous color, it is a violet “your lips but better.” The color is on trend but not scary. The product does glide on wet and smooth and it is not sticky at all.  This was love at first sight-which made me forget all about the Airwick room fresheners…temporarily.

This is what my lips looked like at- 7:03 pm EST.

Yeah, I have to count on my fingers a lot, but even I know that isn’t 10 hours.  I DID have a Dunkin Donuts Caramel Turtle Iced Coffee which is so good I am convinced they get it from a fountain fashioned by angels and men with great cheekbones.  I drank through a straw, but my crazy Vampirella color lipstick from the dollar store lasts through iced coffee, and all that lipstick claims is, “ Hey…I am a dollar.”

So, much like love at first sight, Maybelline 10 HR Stain Gloss doesn’t last. Eventually you find out that the guy who said he was smart doesn’t like the BBC, or hates Star Wars, or thinks Harry Potter is stupid and thinks that some movie with Vin Diesel was the best ever made and you are like…what I am I gonna do with this guy?  So, I will just use the gloss till I am bored with the color, toss it, and stop trying to pick up stuff in the WalMart when I am depressed.

(Author’s note: I am very happily married to the male equivalent of a NARS Red Square Lip Pencil who has great cheekbones)

  • http://www.beautyinfozone.com MarciaF (beauty info zone)

    Can you imagine how a house with 10 open Airwicks would smell? Makes me sick thinking about it.

  • Monika

    Too good to be true! Oh well. Next?

  • http://www.hobbylobbyist.com Elizabeth @ HobbyLobbyist

    First of all, you are hilarious. I loved this review. Second, how did I not realize they still make Vo5 products?

  • http://allyourbasenotes.blogspot.com Jessica

    Is it wrong that I am always excited when Megan has a makeup fail story to share because she’s that much more FRICKIN HILARIOUS?

  • Wendy

    I was thinking of this post while I was in line at self checkout at Wally World today. I was stuck behind a couponer who was also trying to corral his wayward toddler. Took FOREVER.

  • carol whalen

    I bought the coral color for a trip to Key West. Big disappointment. I could have used the money I spent on it for another drink on Duval St…..

  • Wendy

    I actually kinda like the one I picked up, I don’t have any problem with the wear of it. I have a feeling this is probably due to the super bright hot pink color.